Tuesday, February 15, 2011

I come from a land down under!

I'm currently in my third week of being in Australia, and second week of being in Melbourne. At this point, I'm starting to get the hang of things and I generally know what to expect from everything.

For instance, I know that when people ask where in America I'm from, and I tell them Missouri, nine out of ten people will give me a "...oh..uh yeah...alright", trying to pretend they've heard of The Show Me state. Normally, I'll then ask "Have you ever heard of Missouri?" and again, nine out of ten people will say "Nope. But I have heard of LA and New York and Chicago." I tell them that Missouri is in the very middle of the country, and Mizzou is in the very middle of Missouri and KU is the entrance to hell.

However, as you may guess, there is no way for me to be prepared for everything, or know what to expect from everything. My next story is a perfect description of the lifestyle here in Australia, and how it was completely unexpected.

My 21st birthday was on the Thursday of last week, February 10th. My manager and foreman wished me a happy birthday, asked me what I was going to do for it, and then we talked about the differences between birthdays in AU and in America. It was all pretty average stuff. The next morning, I was sitting at my desk when my manager got up and left the office. I thought nothing of it, since we're at a construction site and he has to go check on a lot of things. Fifteen minutes later, we walks back into the office and (see picture below) drops this on my desk.

No, your eyes aren't failing you. That's a 6-pack of beer.

My boss gave me a 6-pack of James Squire Golden Ale for my birthday. While we were at work. In the middle of the day. He acted like he was dropping off a box of pens or something, while I acted like he set down a cage of rabid monkeys. Cultural differences, anyone? I laughed and thanked him for it, and we when on with our day.

(P.S. I don't drink alcohol! It's like giving a prime steak to a vegetarian, or an F-350 truck to a tree hugger, or a good outfielder with a strong arm to the Kansas City Royals. They just don't belong together!)

Regardless of the irony of the gift, it was still a pretty good birthday. I walked around downtown, watched a local cricket match, and then went home. That night, I Skyped with my family to celebrate my birthday! It was early in the morning their time, and so they weren't exactly the most lively folk, but it was great seeing/hearing them on my birthday. They had sent me a package, but I wasn't able to pick it up until the next day. So, the next day, we skyped again, and I opened up my birthday package and guess what I found...Tabasco sauce, Purell hand sanitizer and Welch's grape jelly!
Be jealous.
While those may not seem like great birthday presents, let me explain why there are perfect birthday presents. Tabasco Sauce: I have an addiction to tabasco sauce. Unfortunately, there's no 7-step recovery plan, so I think I'm headed for rock bottom as fast as that tasty topping can take me. Purell: I'm going to be travelling a lot, and there are no guarantees that I'll be able to shower or maintain basic hygiene. Purell fixes that problem. Grape jelly: This is a two parter. First, Australia has jam, not jelly, so thanks to my family, I'm now the only person in Australia with jelly. (ha   ha  ha). Second, Australia doesn't have grape jam, either. So, not only is there no jelly, but there's no grape substitute for grape jelly. But now I have it. Beer:....I got nothing. I guess it looks kind of cool?

Speaking of things that look cool...(and no, there won't be another picture of me flexing, although I was tempted.)...I was out walking around downtown and I wandered into a music shop, turned the corner down an aisle and found myself staring straight an angel.
So what, it's not an angel. It's white, majestic and heavenly. Big deal.
That's a picture of a Gretsch White Falcon, which is one of the most iconic guitars ever. Trent Raines, a fraternity brother of mine, almost had a heart attack when he saw this picture. I can't confirm what he said when he saw this picture, but I'm pretty sure it was something like "ooooooohhhh mmmmyyyyy....no way! what?!".  In person, it is so much prettier than in the picture. It was almost glowing, it looked alive. Oh, and it costs $6,000. That's a pretty Australian penny. (Wait, they don't have pennies. So it's a pretty Australian $1 coin. That doesn't sound nearly as nice.) Speaking of money...

If you have read my previous blogs, you know that I have complained about the prices in Australia. Food, clothes, drinks, almost everything is more expensive than in the USA. However, there is one place where the prices are a little bit more friendly for a penny (or Australian $1 coin) pincher like myself. The Queen Victoria Market!

Think of an outdoor Wal-Mart Supercenter. Then double it.
The Queen Victoria Market has everything you could ever want, and then a bunch of stuff that no one would ever want. There are restaurants, botiques, stores, cafes, variety shops. And then, when you step out into the outdoor part of the Market, you can shop for groceries, fresh produce, clothes, accessories, shoes, towels, belts, jackets, luggage. And the best of it all is that it's all fairly reasonably priced. It's just a short tram ride from my house, open weekdays and Saturdays and Sundays. Definitely the place to be if you're looking for deals.

Last saturday was a great day for me. I spend the morning at the Queen Victoria Market, and wandered the aisles until I felt like I had walked all the way to Sydney, then I hopped on a tram and travelled to the National Sports Museum.

This picture is pretty self-explanatory. National Sports Musuem.
The National Sports Museum is housed inside the Melbourne Cricket Ground, or MCG, or just G (if you're a hip Australian). The MCG is a gigantic stadium with a capacity of 100,00 people. It was the center piece for the Olympics when Melbourne hosted the Olympics in 1956. It was built in 1854, although not on this grand of scale. It also holds the record for tallest light towers in the world, which is oddly random, but still kind of neat.
Look at the size of those towers!

The mini version. They occassionally have ants play full length cricket matches here. 
The National Sports Museum (NSM) is a museum to everything sport in Australia. There are sections for the Olympics, cricket, motorsport, Australian Rules Football, soccer, basketball and many other sports. The museum is dominated by the big three: the Olympics, cricket and Aussie Football. Since I'm an ignorant American, I'm still learning all of the details of both sports and the history behind both games. It was cool to be able to look at the significance of their sports, and begin to learn each sport's history and rules and effect on daily life. The museum was very well done, and gave me a lot of insight to the culture of Australian sport. For instance, I learned a lot about the Australia vs. England rivalry.

Talking smack is nothing new, although this smack is exceptionally grammatically correct.
One of the biggest rivalry matches between Australia and England is a cricket match called The Ashes. It's a series of 7 One Day Test Cricket  matches between Australia and England, and the winner takes home an urn of "ashes". As far as I could tell, the name of the match was taken from the above obituary, which was placed in an English newspaper. That may or may not be true, but it's a pretty sweet story. Australia and England really don't like each other (maybe it's the whole 'colony vs kingdom' thing?), and that is evidenced throughout Australian culture and society.
It's all pretty simple. We don't like you and you don't like us.
Overall, my third week of being an Aussie is going great. I finally found a church that I like, and I can really see myself calling it my church home. I have a friend coming to visit in two weeks and am eagerly looking forward to that. But as of now, I'm enjoying getting to know the city and everyone I meet. I'm enjoying walking around downtown, hanging with my Australian housemates, and taking long naps on the beach. (That last one may sound like I'm joking, but I'm not. Hour long naps on the beach are the best. thing. ever.) Australian is treating me well! I hope everything is good with you back home, and I'd love to hear from you Cheers!

9 comments:

  1. You're so funny.

    I'm very glad you found cheap stuff in Australia. I'm sure it made your heart happy.

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  2. I think you are hysterical, but I am your mom. I'm so glad things are going well! The time is flying by!
    Mom

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  3. Reid,

    Your blog is great! I'm home w/ a sick kiddo today so I had time to read about all of your adventures. I especially loved your grocery store experience. I, too, am a cheapskate and HATE paying for food...especially when I know it costs so much less at Walmart!

    Oh - and swimming with the turtles - incredible!

    When are you visiting the Sydney Opera House?!

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  4. things to do with your beer:

    1. make beer bread: http://www.food.com/recipe/beer-bread-73440

    2. cook chicken with it: http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/the-surreal-gourmet/beer-can-chicken-recipe/index.html

    3. take a sip of it and confirm that beer is gross (except when used in above recipes)

    4. or check out these handy tips of "10 things to do with beer besides drink it" (apparently, it will make your lawn look fabulous): http://www.thebudgetfashionista.com/archive/10-beer-tips-eco/

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  5. Tim R. here. AU sounds amazing so far...keep the commentary coming!

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  6. Great blog Reid. Let me know if you find an H&R Block office.

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  7. You are so funny cousin!! Glad you are having fun! You did indeed receive some odd gifts for your birthday! Can't wait to read the next one!

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  8. Reid, your Great Uncle Joe here. Just read your blog start to finish - WHEW! Never realized a 21 year old guy could be so "wordy." Glad you are enjoying Australia, your work and doing such a good job keeping us informed of your adventures. Will keep Reiding and I'm sure enjoying the blog. Have more fun.

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  9. That was a good post, Reid. Just watched the videos you put up on your facebook. Glad you are getting set in and feeling a little more at home. Figure out how to play Cricket so when you come back we can go play on Stank.
    Chase

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